Which is the best Haribo candy?

It’s not just the bears. Friends, let us repeat: it’s not just the bears.

The (wonderful) world of Haribo is rife with unimaginably delicious, squishy, delightful candies … and a few duds. Such is the world of the sweet treat.

So we grabbed a bunch of Haribo candies available in the U.S. — FYI, some of the labels are in German because that was the deal at Economy Candy — tasted each, then judged away. 

SEE ALSO: Dogs, ranked

You may disagree with these rankings. That’s okay! It’s subjective. But if you catch yourself feeling angry, please promise us you’ll get yourself a packet of Haribo to make yourself feel better.

And now:

The embarrassing

Berries: Berries are aesthetically pleasing, but they do not taste good. In fact, they taste bad — far too sugary with no flavor payoff — and leave a sweater-y film on your teeth. Just put them in a clear jar and leave them there.

Image: Mashable/Lili Sams

Gummi Frogs: Taste like plastic. Impossible to chew. And the frog speaking German on our bag reminded us of Pepe, which is frankly a real bummer.

Image: Mashable/Lili Sams

Mini Rainbow Frogs: Unfortunately, the white marshmallow-y section has ruined what was otherwise a perfectly good gummy. Also, Rainbow Frogs are so small that popping one in your mouth isn’t super satisfying.

Image: Mashable/Lili Sams

Tropifruitti: Oh my god, these suck so much! They taste like a hospital smells. Bad! Give these to your enemies.

Image: Mashable/Lili Sams

The fine

Dinosaurs: Cool shapes, but the flavors are not particularly distinguishable. Said one staffer, “I would never want to eat more than three of these.”

Image: Mashable/Lili Sams

Smurfs: Smurfs are strawberry and raspberry flavored, which are generally great flavors anyway, so it works out fine. They do get stuck in your teeth easily and are maybe too chewy. Smurfs are fine.

Image: Mashable/Lili Sams

Fizzy Cola: Sadly, Fizzy Cola is inferior to Happy Cola because of whatever lemon-lime business it is attempting. Verdict: fine.

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